How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
