And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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