1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize