I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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