Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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