haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Floor bacon is actually really good
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
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