So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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