When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
third nipple confirmed
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
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