He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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