no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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