quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
