There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
