i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Randomize
