Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
