you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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