dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
