You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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