There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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