Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
