everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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