dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
