I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
