We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
