I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
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