Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Randomize
