260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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