Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
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