I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
This house was built for laser tag.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
