okay pat passed out under dana's car
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize