it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
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