Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
