It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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