lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
So many bounce houses so little time
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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