Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
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