her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
