I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Randomize
