Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
