what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
