Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
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