ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize