even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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