either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
