You're completely useless in the revolution.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
