i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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