I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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