on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
