at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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