as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I'm just crazy horny about you
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
