i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
