you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Your cock deserves a montage
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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