I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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