...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
